Monday, June 25, 2012

my life and the way its gonna be

Just read this beautiful quote on sometimes sweet from Ann Druyan about her late husband Carl beautiful and touching....and exactly how I want to live and love

"When my husband died, because he was so famous and known for not being a believer, many people would come up to me — it still sometimes happens — and ask me if Carl changed at the end and converted to a belief in an afterlife. They also ask me if I think I will see him again. Carl faced his death with unflagging courage and never sought refuge in illusions. The tragedy was that we knew we would never see each other again. I don’t ever expect to be reunited with Carl. But, the great thing is that when we were together, for nearly twenty years, we lived with a vivid appreciation of how brief and precious life is. We never trivialized the meaning of death by pretending it was anything other than a final parting. Every single moment that we were alive and we were together was miraculous — not miraculous in the sense of inexplicable or supernatural. We knew we were beneficiaries of chance… That pure chance could be so generous and so kind… That we could find each other, as Carl wrote so beautifully in Cosmos, you know, in the vastness of space and the immensity of time… That we could be together for twenty years. That is something which sustains me and it’s much more meaningful…

The way he treated me and the way I treated him, the way we took care of each other and our family, while he lived. That is so much more important than the idea I will see him someday. I don’t think I’ll ever see Carl again. But I saw him. We saw each other. We found each other in the cosmos, and that was wonderful."
this really just got me thinking...especially right now while i am on the verge of this huge life change.  i am so excited about moving with matt, and i am even more excited to see what this brand new part of our life is going to bring. 
 i am going to miss home so much though.  i wish i could package everyone up and take them all with me.  but i've done a lot of thinking and i think this quote, and especially the part about how we lived together here while i've been home, that's what i am taking with me in my heart.  this time i've been living with my parents....the times my sister and i have from pittsburgh, the nyc trips with my mom and sisters....the precious moments i've had with busia.  these are all miraculous.  they're our moments.  they'll never be gone.  they're in my heart. 
now is the time for me and matt to start our journey.  we're both so excited.  i can tell by the number of times he calls me throughout the day....and the way he talks about the dogs.....he already has our whole summer break planned out.  my goodness i am so excited. 
love is such a good good love, sister love, momma love, good true and meaningful love

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