i haven't posted in forever...partly because i have been super crazy busy wwith school and work, partly because i have been out of town fir a little while, and partly because i feel like i haven't had anything really profound to say.
but today....i have been thinking of something. my laptop broke unexpectedly. luckily, i turned in my final project for school a few days ago, so i am done with school for the next 9 days. but after it happened, i suddenly felt like i was immediately out of touch with the cyber world. even though i had my prone working just fine right nixt to me. i felt like....oh my gosh....how will i get online? how will i check my email? what will i do without my laptop while it's being fixed?
now, one thing to know about me is that when things break that are out of my control or stop working for some reason (ie cars, computers, phones, etc.) i tend to lose my mind until someone (either matt or my family or both) brings me back to reality and calms me down. Last night, it happened to be my brother in law and my sister. i didn't freak out as much as i usually do, but they gave me good advise about who to take it to to fix it. so i did, but being that i wasnt in my home town, i had to wait until i got home today to take it to the geek squad.
they were very nice there and they helped me out as much as possible. they even saved me $100 in the process which i am grateful for. when they ran all the tests they couldnt find anything wrong....so they couldn't really fix anything. i was a little relieved thati didnt have to spend $200 to fix it, but a little scared that there is still something wrong and maybe they just didnt find it.
but when i brought it home tonight, and it wouldnt even turn on.....i just about lost it....thats when those feelings set in like i was immediately losing touch with the world of facebook and pinterest and my daily blogs that i read.
i called their 1-800 number and got some things figured out and had a plan....thats when the calm started to set in again. I sat down out in the living room with my mom and my little netbook (that's what i am typing on now) and i told her my anxious feelings about the cyberworld. i dont want to be that type of person. i dont want to check my phone ever 2.5 seconds for whats happening on facebook like i have missed something life changing. why have i become that?
i do not what this cyber world to have this much control over me. how many of the 190 friend on facebook do i really talk to? is there really that much that i am missing if i dont have access to facebook? it actually makes me sick to think i have become a person like this.
i need to unplug. i need to take this as a sign that these things do not and will not control my life anymore. i just dont want any part of it. i want to sit down and enjoy a book, or meditate, or hang out with my mom and my dogs, or maybe bake something delicious and healthy for my family to enjoy. there are so many more productive things i should be using my time for.
so over the course of the next few days...i want to start making a list. i want to list the things i could be and should be doing with my time rather than spending it checking my phone or on the computer. and i would love some suggestions on how to unplug. to get away from the darn internet for a little while. and how to get back to the way life was abd how it should be before the world of facebook, iphones, and being so "connected" all the time.