work

i have been working on myself lately.  sometimes i am doing well, but this week i am not.  i believe that this is all part of the process.  good days and bad days.  i was excited to be having so many good days, but these bad days have been filled with many extreme emotions.  it's hard to feel helpless.  and thinking about the unknown is even worse. this uncertainty.  sometimes things happen that are out of our control.  the only thing that remains is that "time" thing i spoke about a few posts back.  currently, time is my worst enemy.  i feel like there is too much of it, too much to dwell on, too many hours in the day, and it's something that i have to give someone because i love them.  i don't want to give it, because i'm scared it's going to become something all too precious that i'm going to wish back at some point.  but here is that uncertainty.  that unknown. 

i'm supposed to be working on myself during this time.  that is what i'll do.  moments of emotion, tears, anger, pain, sometimes cleansing breaths, random  moments of calm, frequent heartbeats filled with anxeity.  but i will make it.  somehow, i seem to find strenght somewhere.  sometimes through hope.  and hope is what i hold on to. 

vegas in october

My trip to visit matt was magical.  We had the most wonderful time and spent every second together.  It felt so good to have him near me in the flesh, and we were able to reconnect.  The absolute best part was the fact that i could reach out and hug him whenever i wanted. 

Just a short 38 days until i get to see him again!  Bring on the countdown!

Here are some highlights from our trip

I miss him already and i cannot wait to see him again soon!!!

so so lucky

Tonight is tuesday....tomorrow is wednesday.....the next day is thursday.  Thursday is the day i drive to pittsburgh after work to see my sister, have a nice dinner with her, stay the night at her house...and then FRIDAY!!!!  Friday is the day i get up really really really early to make my flight at 6:20am to fly to Vegas to see my hunny!

i. love. ellen.

Remember this post with that beautiful little floral green teacup.  Well, a couple weeks ago, after a long day of kindergarten....I had a little brown box waiting for me at home.  That little brown box was from one of the dearest people I know.

See her?  That's Ellen, Matt's sister.  I believe in my heart of hearts that we are soul sisters.  Well, i have no clue where that teacup had come from, i just saw it in a photograph, and was smitten with it.  So, i open up the little brown package and out pops this!

Yup, my souls sister searched and searched and found the cup right here.  And ever since then, I am loving my coffee in the mornings.  And i pretty much also love her. 

the funny thing about time

It's finally here.  This time next week i will be sitting and my sisters house, probably just getting back from a delicious dinner, too excited to go to bed.  I feel like it's taken forever to get here...but my trip to see Matt is just a week away.  Ugh thank goodness.....I feel like I have been counting down forever! 

I always thought of "time" as something of a crazy mystery.  You never seem to have enough of it...it's always dragging....you never feel like waiting for things to happen...sometimes other things seem to take forever.  How is this "time" thing so much of a troublmaker in my life?

And from October 7th to the 10th, when I am back in Vegas visiting Matt, it's going to mess with me again.  As looooong as i have waited to see him, some of the days have just gone by so slowly.  And during my 3 day visit, i just know time will fly by quicker than i want it to.

Why can't the days that i wait and wait in anticipation fly by the way they will when i am there, trying to drink in every moment with him?

Ugh darn you Mr. Time!!! 

What i DO know is that i am going there with zero expectations and i am just going to enjoy every single minute i get to spend with him.  Living so far apart is hard enough, the last thing i want to do is WASTE my time thinking about what i expected my trip to be like.  I want to take a walk with him, maybe have a nice meal or two, enjoy quiet time together, have a cold beer with him, and just take in every detail of him to hold me over until Thanksgiving.  Time will not get to me during those days.....i do know that....because i will not let it!

sunbeams

Today was a beautiful day....the sun was out, the sky was blue, there were big fluffy soft clouds in the sky, my students behaved themselves today, i had a GREAT yoga class, and I get to see my Matt in just a very very short 10 days!!!  So i thought i'd leave you with some sunbeam love today!

Enjoy :)

we <3 it

Oh and this little bacon stealing pug...so cute that i was to just smoosh her little face in!



Momma's got a brand new bag!!!!

YES I GOT ONE!!!!  I SCORED SOME MISSONI FOR TARGET STUFF!!! WWOOOOOOOOOTTTTT!!!!!!

thanks to my little ol' town of Erie, PA.....they still has some stuff on the racks in my size!  Not much....but I did get the skirt i liked!  I seorusly didn't think that anyone in Erie would know who or what Missoni was, but they did....and it was pretty picked over...but i guess i had a little lucky star watching out for me today!! 

I got this skirt-----

and this GREAT tote bag for school

and momma REALLY wants these too but they didn't have any in my size

Obviously, I know they are all the same print and even though i am no fashionista, I know not to wear them all together....don't worry folks!

Wheeeeee wheeeeee wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!!  I am so excited!